after i die.

the following reasons are given for me going straight to hell upon my demise:

• last night, i watched three episodes (in a row!) of the real world (while my better half proceeded to roll his eyes and put on his headphones) and actually cared when landon missed work at the playground. how could he? he needs that recommendation from laura! we tried to watch the l word, but gave up. season two just isn't doing it for me. (or my better half who can usually tough it out due to the lesbian scenes.)
• i got mad at my mom.
• we get one new appliance and it throws off our kitchen's harmony. now where are we going to put our wine? how 'bout those cookbooks? and what about our cool juicer? i can't hang! (that said, i guess it's worth it considering my better half spends $620.50 on coffee each year. we decided it's about time we brew at home. the first batch was so weak he threw it out. the next batch was apparently satisfactory, though i'm not wholly convinced he didn't just stop at the coffeehouse on the way into the office.)
• i've been in bed by 8:30 the past three nights and getting in there that late was a struggle. shouldn't i be doing something with my time besides sleeping?
• i found four (count 'em: four!) pairs of pants this weekend. this in and of itself needs to be deemed a miracle. my sin? only one pair was on sale.
• our friends eloped and i'm not that happy for them.
• our other friends just had a baby and i'm envious of their lifestyle of the rich and not famous. that kid is set!
• friday was the first time i talked to our not-so-new neighbors. why? because there was a lost dog involved. that shouldn't surprise any of you.
• i'm secretly glad that i don't have to talk to every single dog owner i meet now that i'm wearing earbuds during our walks.